somebody else is saying your prayer

a willingness to be broken,
why is that so laughable at?
your laughter comes from within your bubble,
your shrieks of short giggles will pierce it soon enough.

a desire to break,
is the desire for difference,
searches for the desire to experience,
acts on the desire to learn,
motivates the desire to heal,
drives the desire to touch,
aimed at the desire to change,
defines the desire for purpose.

doesn't brokenness fill this empty shell,
what is this frame for if its just to laugh?
why is the shallow closer to the shore,
and not towards that vast expanse?

"why bother?"
cause you don't, i do.

when nonchalant becomes an emotion

everything has an exit,
emotions are just blind in finding them.

empirical walkway,
just not very well lit,
turn back for a timeless mix up,
step back to lose your footing.

why does fiery rage freezes life in place?
or why does numbness hardens?

love to witness blinds the sight,
tender approaches retracts the curious.

some experiences aren't for learning,
they are just a reminder for when you hit replay.

when i'm a bullet shot out of a gun

can we really give too much?
no one can rate what you see,
what you value, what you want.
so is the limit your limit?
is it the majority's take again?
would there be a wrong or right?
we say no,
but that's not what we show.

hide, hide, keep it right,
'cause better no one knows your might,
it hurts, it harms, all for pride,
in the end, the recognition's in spite.

don't hide behind a mask,
do it behind a smile,
its less obvious,
don't we all have too...
life's beautiful,
made perfect with
cuts and bruises,
tears and sorrow,
those are the fine brush works,
detailing each painting.

All At Once
- The Fray

goodbye never leaves the door properly

we aren't alone when we think we are,
who do we think we are?
'special'? 'unique'?,
that we face something so different
from one another.
we define ourselves,
that's special.
what we face,
that's just human.
we go through what?

loneliness?
whether its when no one's around
or when everyone's around.

abandonment?
left aside to rot on one's
own misery.

rejection?
no acceptance, all judgment,
simply turned away.

replacement?
to see everything that once was
with some or one, being attended
to by another.

unappreciated?
words, actions and efforts all taken
for granted, seemingly bland.

unassured?
without words necessary to cope,
without actions necessary to comfort.

average?
similar to the majority, not dearly held by
anyone, and die a familiar death.

degraded?
self worth and esteem no longer
in existence, dashed by your 'loved' ones.

insulted?
backstabbing, a fleet of lies and rumors,
or just a face to face spat.

worthlessness?
to feel that one is just a burden,
who has not contributed to anyone's life,
like dust in the wind.

directionless?
purposeless, just plain lost in this
controversial world.

misunderstood?
every action and every thought always
seem to spark anger, distrust and hatred.

not understood?
every action and every thought never getting across,
not bothered, and forcibly thrown aside.

forgotten?
a friend of replacement, just simply not remembered
and no acknowledgement of remembrance.

emptiness?
not seen, not heard, not touched,
but ever so real when felt,
the cliché void,
but the reality is there.

an ever stretching list.

and out of the 6.6 billion people or so
on this green and blue planet,
can we say we face one common
enemy and friend all alone?
life.
life, with all its opposing qualities and matter,
to toy or be toyed,
to hurt or be hurt,
to care or be cared for.
or maybe you prefer
to love and hate,
to give and take,
to smile and spite,
to make and break,
or simply,
good and evil.
everything opposes,
wonderful, don't you think?
everything compensates,
all in balance,
its just a matter of which opposite
has more media exposure.
we are the audience of war,
we watch what we want displayed.
commercial love is so overrated,
real love is underrated.
but the first is easier, no?

Generation Y.
that's us.
no longer family orientated,
we call them strangers we live with,
and yet we allow strangers into our hearts
everyday? why is that?
a general acceptance?
to clear boredom?
to settle loneliness and all of the above?
and what do we do with them?
hope we benefit our desires and hunger
off them?
cannibalism to feed our thoughts, our hurts,
our pains to restore what they have yet to bring?
we constantly tell ourselves it isn't a
one way friendship, cause conscience is
a very unforgiving gift.
do we really take responsibility for every life
we introduce ourselves to?
to care like we desire for, to love like we long for.

"A friend to all is a friend to none"

- Aristotle

treat others how you want others to treat you?
with such low standards this generation has on
lasting friendships, its not a wonder how people
can follow that saying and yet not have close friends.
we limit the love, the care, the effort and God knows
what else we limit ourselves in giving the blessings
in our lives, simply because of fear.
be slow when entering a friendship, but when you are in,
put in more, put in better, and make the giving constant, right?
are we so fragile that we break at the slightest hurt,
disappointment, let down, heartache and from then
fear every potential great friendship from forming?

how do we define a friend anyway?
there to laugh with, talk with,
play with, bum around with?
then i guess that's all we will get back as well.
we tell ourselves, no, they are more than that.
but really? do you take that as believable?
some heart to heart, and all of a sudden
you have a 'close' friend.
so i guess we are all out there to disprove the saying:

"One friend in a lifetime is much,
two are many, three are hardly possible.
Friendship needs a certain parallelism of life,
a community of thought, a rivalry of aim."

- Henry Brooks Adams

maybe we think we can keep at the very least 2o, huh?
just saying, sometimes even one is not easy.



'No Goodbyes'
-Blue

99 steps, i see nil.

weakness till sadness,
a battle run highway.

a knowledge for disappearance,
wisdom for concealment,
its dances are brief,
a singled out glow.
with misfit misplaced,
and arches reform,
a tiled mess lay before,
let it burn.

a felt of consciousness,
with a longing return,
just tired of the far-fetched,
in draggy unison.
a gather of reasons,
for something so simple,
in steam, frustration,
in memory, perseverance.
as usual, majority wins,
but minority keeps on kicking,
simple encouragement,
'just play better'.

let comfort play executioner,
its words, the iron axe,
its satisfaction, the might of the swing,
its abandonment, a basket full.
and weep to know,
there's no remorse,
a black hooded companion,
never a good choice.

life,

just life.

missing a diamond on wings, criss cross

persistency over air,
tiresome in searching,
acquiescence comes first,
negation, second.

---------------------------

bother me with boredom,
pass it on with nonsense,
electrify the convenience,
and make known its annoyance.

---------------------------

i'm waking up tonight,
wishful for the morning light,
but alas, in my fright,
nothing i do is right.

he is but a lonely docent,
a train through abandonment,
running its tracks through impermanence,
bounded by benevolence.

actions alone do not define,
alone, they provoke.

crossing

keep one, keep one,
another is on hold. gain another.
save one, save one,
another is lost. craft another.
lose one, lose one,
another blossoms. strengthen another.

obvious choice,
or maybe not

i'm what i am,
i'm what i'm not,
personal definition,
is something and nothing.

come what may